Are you happy with your job? Or, if you don't work, is the bread winner in your family happy with their job?
The answer to that may vary day by day, but can you imagine being forced into a job far below you because you didn't have the confidence to strive for a job worthy of your skills? The day by day drudgery would be soul killing. For adults that were affected early on by damage to their self-esteem due to a learning disability, this is often what happens. And a whole range of negative emotions ensue. Depression, anger, frustration, and hopelessness.
This, of course leads to strained relationships, divorce, bankruptcy, and a long list of misfortune.
When counseling adults, they often bring up childhood events that formed their opinions of themselves. These adults, later in life, realize how negative events shaped their self-esteem, career choices, relationships, and overall well-being.
During counseling sessions, I hear of tales of degrading and unkind words from teachers, bully like behavior from peers, and so on stemming from a learning or physical disability.
How as parents and teachers can we prevent these negative events before they blemish a child’s self-esteem?
Alex was such a child. Damaged by a childhood event. During his fifth-grade year, he was called upon by his teacher to read out loud for the class. The teacher stops Alex from continuing and commands another student to read instead. If that was not humiliating enough, the teacher sent Alex out of the classroom with an ultimatum. When Alex learned to read then he could return to his class. In spite of Alex’s effort, his reading did not improve.
During his fifth-grade year, he was called upon by his teacher to read out loud for the class. The teacher stop pedAlex from continuing and commanded another student to read instead. If that was not humiliating enough, the teacher sent Alex out of the classroom with an ultimatum. When Alex learned to read then he could return to his class. In spite of Alex’s effort, his reading did not improve.
"WHEN YOU CAN READ YOU CAN COME BACK TO CLASS!!!"
In spite of the threat. And in spite of Alex’s effort, his reading did not improve.
Alex was later diagnosed with dyslexia. No amount of effort trying to read would have helped much. Without addressing the micro-skills causing his dyslexia, no amount of effort or extra practice would help.
The only thing this teacher did was severely damage Alex's self-esteem.
Emotional Damage
Was Alex harmed emotionally by the treatment in class? Absolutely! Students with learning disabilities are often teased, put down, or ostracized more frequently prior to their diagnosis and subsequent accommodations and assistance. Even after a child receives assistance, they can become stigmatized all potentially leading to lower self-esteem. How can we boost a child’s self-esteem? Here are a few methods: Provide positive role models
Absolutely! Students with learning disabilities are often teased, put down, or ostracized more frequently prior to their diagnosis and subsequent accommodations and assistance. Even after a child receives assistance, they can become stigmatized all potentially leading to lower self-esteem. How can we boost a child’s self-esteem? Here are a few methods: Provide positive role models.
Students with learning disabilities are often teased, put down, or ostracized more frequently prior to their diagnosis. After a diagnosis it may get worse. Accomodations and assistance give classmates a reason to tease. And that teasing goes deep.. Even after a child receives assistance, they can become stigmatized all potentially leading to lower self-esteem. How can we boost a child’s self-esteem? Here are a few methods: Provide positive role models
School assistance or an IEP can cause a child to become stigmatized. This, of course, leads to lower self-esteem.
How can we boost a child’s self-esteem?
Here are a few methods:
- Provide positive role models of individuals who have “overcome” their learning disability.
- Incorporate the child into a support group of others who have learning disabilities.
- Focus on and nurture what the child excels at—art, sports, music, etc.
- Encourage children not to compare themselves—foster a mindset that we are all uniquely gifted.
- Check out Pinterest and search for self-esteem activities there are several categorized by age!
My favorite I found on Pinterest is creating an “I am board…"
The Neuroscience of Self-Esteem
In the program we use, the Learning Success System, there are actually neuroscience-based approaches to raising self-esteem. These techniques use the latest in neuroscience to quickly and easily increase self-esteem in children even if it has already been severely damaged. If you want to get started on the complete system you can get that here. Or if you want to get a sampling of self-esteem exercises used in the system you can get a free mini-course which covers self-esteem and other learning issues delivered by facebook messenger by clicking here.
Key Takeaways:
Greatness is a choice
Let’s face it if you are a teacher or parent spending any amount of time in the classroom or home with children you know that children have feelings. That is obvious. What might not be obvious is the long term effect of these feelings. They can either drive a child to do great things (Strong self-confidence) or to never have the courage to try anything challenging ever (low self-confidence)
We need to create a cocoon of love, acceptance and safety for our children to protect these feelings.
We also need to use strategies to develop not only self-esteem, but also learning ability, discipline, and drive. Or what we call grit. Strategies that are found in the Learning Success System.
A learning difficulty, if not handled properly, can cause a child to never live up to their potential. Handled properly it can be a launching pad for greatness as a child learns to work through difficulty.
Being a fantastic parent means doing your best to produce well-rounded, educated, and mentally healthy adults who can thrive in life. At the very core of that is developing their self-esteem and teaching them grit.
Self-esteem is the foundation for any child as they learn, grow, and interacts in their communities. Let’s do all we can to build our children’s self-esteem so they can achieve greatness!
“Is your child having difficulty with reading or other academics?” “Wondering if it’s dyslexia?” Use our free dyslexia test to get answers. Simply answer a few easy questions and find out now
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